life. faithful.

i realized today, while reading another blog, that although i've been pouring out who i am right now here, for everyone to see, i haven't told you where i come from. i wrote about who i am, but i didn't write about how i got that way. i've talked a lot about the path ahead of me, but i haven't given you a picture of the path that has led me to where i am right now. so, that's what this is the start of. i don't know how many posts it will take, but i want you all to know who this crazy girl is and what has made her maybe a little different... my story. it's long, and when i write i tend to get a bit carried away. since that's the case, i don't want to hit you with one massive, novel of a blog post. i guess i'm going to get all fancy here and start a "series." here goes-- i was born in arkansas to a teacher/coach father and the epitome of the doting mother. i was the second baby, a little girl to follow the firstborn so...

so, i had this great idea this morning that i would start a series of posts (getting fancy, right?) on what proverbs 31 says about women. i even started some notes, starting with what seems to be the general consensus of what a "christian woman" is thought to be, going on to what society says women should be, and winding my way around to the proverbs chapter. sounds great, right? well, as is often the case in my life...plans changed. i started this morning off right (for the first time in a long time, to be honest) by reading my bible. i flipped straight to proverbs 31, right to the section i was planning on writing about. that's where i saw a note i had written in the margins to check out a verse in chapter 18. if i had my bible right here next to me i would tell you what verse it was, but all i have right now is the digital version that doesn't have all my notes in it. oh well! well, reading that verse led me to flipping forward a bit through the book and...

how is everybody? it seems like it's been a long time since i wrote last. we had spring break last week and i didn't have internet access for a big part of it (no, we weren't anywhere remote--just at my parents'). i've been chomping at the bit to get on here because i have big news--my family is in for a huge change. those of you who have been following my journey here have had a glimpse of the stress and uncertainty in my life right now. some of you have sent prayers up on my behalf, not really knowing what you were praying for.  first off, thank you. i've definitely felt your support. that said, the "brand new information!" (sorry--i had to throw in the "friends" reference...) we found out at the beginning of spring break that i've been accepted into a medical physics graduate program! i am beyond excited right now, and it has been really hard to keep this news quiet for the last week. i had to tell my administrators at school...

i just read this blog (thanks for posting it on facebook, Jill!). it made me smile, so i thought i would share it. for anybody who doesn't want to take the time to click over to read the article, Lysa TerKeurst was talking a little bit about what it was like raising a daughter who doesn't necessarily go along with the norm...that's probably putting it nicely! for anybody who has been around my little munchkin, you know that i've definitely been tasked with that same thing. she exasperates me, frustrates me, terrifies me, and amazes me--and i wouldn't change her for the world. there have been times when i've thought, desperate, that i wished she would just behave , just go along with the norm for a while. i've struggled with worrying about how people judge me as a parent when she's been a puppy at wal-mart or laid on the bottom rack of the cart at the grocery store. i've watched her roll around at the park while other parents tell their...

after pouring out my heart here yesterday, i stumbled (haha--guess it was a "God thing") across a verse. i think i saw it in the king james version, but i'm going to share the message's take on it with you all... "but I'll take the hand of those who don't know the way, who can't see where they're going. I'll be a personal guide to them, directing them through unknown country. I'll be right there to show them what roads to take, make sure they don't fall into the ditch. These are the things I'll be doing for them--sticking with them, not leaving them for a minute." ~isaiah 42:16 i've used a metaphor quite a bit like this one before to describe my walk with God, saying that i know He's leading me down this path i can't see. i've described it like this: sometimes, i feel like the light God is leading me with is something very similar to a lightning bug. it shows up faintly for a minute, then the light flashe...

"what doesn't kill you makes you stronger." that's what they say. sometimes, i wonder who they are, and what kind of easy life they have. i don't know about you, but when i'm in the middle of a bad situation--things going on that just don't make sense, that seem to be tearing everything apart--i don't usually stop to remember that i'll be better for it. when i'm struggling through the crashing waves fighting to keep my head above water desperately trying to catch a breath i don't think, "wow, if i manage to get out of this without drowning, i'm going to be a much better swimmer!" you wanna know something? i don't think they think that way, either. right now, i'm in those waves. my whole family is, to be honest. we're waiting to find out what's going to happen with the rest of our life (well, waiting for news about next fall that will impact the rest of our life). we are recovering from illne...

my life isn't perfect. my family struggles to make the ends of the months meet. my kids have days where everything they say comes out as a whine (i have to admit i have those days, too). we get sick. my house is a mess. i'm not in the job of my dreams. my first finished manuscript is getting older as we speak without being sent out. sometimes i feel like my 7th grade class will be the death of me.   life isn't perfect. i'm not perfect. but i have a God who is. sometimes i lose sight of that. i see everything around me  and i forget to look up. i serve a God who is perfect,  whose plans are perfect,  and whose gifts are even perfect: "every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." (james 1:17, NIV)  He has given me many gifts. first of all, i've lived for over 10,000 days. that's a lot of days i've been given gifted.  He's given me a...